Having spent some considerable time with both sides of my family over the last month, I find myself thinking about how we talk to those with whom we are familiar. How it can be relaxed and comfortable, then suddenly formulaic. It can become sharp and irritated in the flip of a dime, no time at all and we find ourselves in the heat and flare of anger.

Then I remember reading, ‘Reflections before Admonishing’
Admonishing is something we do not often admit to, though especially with family members, we have the tendency to indulge in admonishing, usually because we really want them to do well, to be happy and thrive.
These potent reflections can make the desire to admonish an opportunity for awareness and can increase our ability to make contact rather than ruffle feathers.

Reflections before Admonishing

Is now a good time to speak?
Am I telling the whole truth?
Is my voice gentle, not harsh?
Am I motivated by kindness?
Am I motivated by a desire to be helpful?

Aren’t they thoughtful?
Next time we speak, can we bring one to mind?